Once again I found myself pulling up to the drive thru speaker. I was battling between the overwhelming need to satisfy my most recent sugar craving and blocking out the (much quieter) voice saying “don’t do it”. Like many times before, the sugar won again and I ordered my “go to” – a box of 20 timbits. And yes, I ate every single one.
It was episodes like this and the constant binging on sweets and junk food to get me through the day that contributed to my gaining over 100lbs in the past 5 years.
I recognized years ago that I had a problem: I was unhealthy and I needed to get into better shape. I tried every (and I mean EVERY) single “diet” out there. No carb, counting points, supplement shakes, gluten free, fat free, you know the drill. I found temporary success with each method. But to be honest, each one was absolute torture! My cravings were intense and I constantly felt deprived. Each diet would boast that it would “not leave you feeling hungry” and this was probably true, but I didn’t eat because I felt hungry – I ate because I craved sugar and felt I would go crazy without it! Having my small allotted sugar “in moderation” was never enough for me and always left me wanting more. I would say I had a “sweet tooth” as if that was some sort of reasonable justification for my out of control eating habits.
About a year ago, I finally just gave up and decided that I would be one of those people that felt comfortable with my size and my unhealthy body. That is so easy to say until the seatbelt on the flight to your family vacation doesn’t fit around you, and you are too winded to do most physical activities with your kids. Shopping for clothes is a nightmare. Being asked to be a friend’s bridesmaid is a horrifying thought. The constant sweating, the humiliation of failing a physical and being denied insurance at 29 years of age, and the list goes on. With each passing day it became more difficult to convince myself that this was “okay”. What was wrong with me? I am a driven person. When I set my mind to something, I can usually accomplish it. Except when it came to this. With this, I felt defeated…….
…..until about 6 months ago when I started to change everything! Now I have lost 60lbs and have completely changed the way I live! I have learned that there really is no quick fix and each day I’m learning something new. I still have a long way to go to reach my goals, but I am so excited with what I’ve been able to accomplish so far. This blog is about sharing struggles in an honest way. Hopefully this will be an opportunity to learn more from others as well. I’ll be posting lots of tested and true recipes, fitness tips, and anything else that I think would be useful to share. If you are on a journey similar to mine- YOU CAN DO IT! And wouldn’t it be fun to do it together?! 🙂